CENTRAL THOUGHT
The character of our children tomorrow, is sharpened by what they learn from us today.
HYMN: TELL THE GLAD STORY
TEXT: Genesis 18:16-19,
Deut. 6:1-9, Prov. 22:6
INTRODUCTION
Children constitute a big asset in the church and the society at large. They are a bundle of potentials and remain the bedrock of a future generation. Therefore, no church or society should fail to pay attention to the development of her children, spiritually, physically, socially etc.
Children are the leaders of tomorrow and if we bring them up wholesomely, our Nation will experience peace and progress. Little wonder then that United Nations Organization (UNO) declared 1979 the International Year of the child (IYC) in acknowledgement that today’s children have a great future. They therefore deserve encouragement and recognition.
This is in contrast to what happens in some churches and homes where children are neglected. Jesus said in Mark 10:14 “…Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God”.
Some parents also toil day and night to provide the physical needs of their children, but never bother to teach them the way of the Lord. Just as a child grows physically into adulthood, so too he needs to develop and mature spiritually. If this does not happen, we should be concerned. Parents, Pastors, Sunday School teachers, school administrators and other adults have their role to play in bringing up children. A Christian heritage is the best legacy we can bequeath to our children.
LESSON OBJECTIVES
The objectives of this study are:
- To know the meaning of a total child.
- To highlight the need for a thorough development of the child.
- To know those who have the responsibility of raising up the total child.
- To examine the roles we can play in the development of the total child.
- To know the effect of neglecting parental responsibilities.
BIBLE TRUTH
Q1. WHO IS A CHILD?
Chambers Universal Learners Dictionary defined a child as “ a young human being of either sex”, “a son or a daughter of any age”.
Legally speaking, in Nigeria, a child is any one below the age of 18 years. Yet in some other countries anyone below the age of 21 years is regarded as a child.
Thus, there is no universally accepted definition of a child. For the purpose of this study, we shall consider anybody who is under the authority of another person whether biological parents or guardians as a child. Such an individual is not independent economically, socially and spiritually.
Q2. WHAT DO YOU UNDERSTAND BY “RAISING UP A TOTAL CHILD”?
Man is a tripartite being-spirit, soul and body. 1 Thessalonians 5:23 reads “And the very God of peace sanctify you wholly; and I pray God your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ”.
The body is the outward sheath which gives us world-consciousness. The soul comprises the intellect which aids us in the present state of existence and the emotions which proceed from the senses hence it is often termed self-consciousness. The spirit is that part by which we commune with God and by which we are able to apprehend and worship Him. It is called the element of God-consciousness. The development of these three components of a child is very important. To concentrate in the development of any of the components to the detriment of others is catastrophic. Some parents have been known to have relinquished the responsibility of providing the basic things of life to their children. The scripture says; but if any provide not for his own, and especially for those in his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worst than an infidel (1 Tim. 5:8). Some other parents toil day and night to provide the physical needs of their children without ever giving much thought to their spiritual needs.
Raising up a total child involves teaching them about God and godliness, virtue of good works, hard work, respect for elders and constituted authority, feeding and accommodating them, providing for their education or vocation as much as it lies on us.
Raising up a total child therefore is to care for the spirit, soul and body of the child. Thus, the total child is one who knows the Lord and has dedicated his body, soul and spirit to the service of the Lord and humanity.
Q3. WHY SHOULD CHRISTIAN PARENTS BE COMMITTED TO RAISING UP THE TOTAL CHILD?
The child is exposed to several influences from school, neighborhood, church etc. He listens to different kinds of people and watches others doing things most of which are ungodly. He sees people quarrelling and cursing. Immoralities, corruption, cheating, violence, pornography, and other forms of Ungodliness are widespread in these environments. The days are evil. One of the signs that we are nearing the close of this age is the widespread interest in witchcraft, astrology, and other forms of the occult. Thousands consult their horoscopes each day, attend seances, or seek to communicate with deceased loved ones. There is also a great interest in satanism and demons.
At birth, the character is blank but at he grows up, these environments make certain imprints in his brain which forms the bedrock of his character. Every ideal Christian parent will therefore start off early enough to inculcate Christian virtues into the child. As the scripture puts it “train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it”, Prov. 22:6. This will put the child in the position to make godly choices and have his soul saved.
In addition, the parent needs to provide for the physical needs of the child. It is a God-given responsibility. Failure to do so reduces a Christian parent to a lower level, than an unbeliever (1 Tim. 5:8). When these needs are not provided, the child goes outside the house to seek for them and in most cases through ungodly means. He finally brings disgrace to the family and constitutes a nuisance to the society. To avoid these unpleasant consequences, parents should provide the spiritual and physical needs of their children.
Q4. WHO HAS THE PRIMARY RESPONSIBILITY OF BRINGING UP THE TOTAL CHILD?
The Church, the school teacher, the principal, the adult and the society at large, all contribute to the up-bringing of the total child. However, it is the primary responsibility of the father, mother, or guardian to care for their children’s spirit, soul and body. This moral and divine responsibility cannot be neglected for whatever reason.
Christian parents should accept their God-given role with all seriousness and sense of commitment. They should provide and protect their children, train them up in the fear and nurture of the Lord, encourage them and teach them about life, play more purposeful roles in the academic life of their children and help in preparing them for their future careers.
Q5. DISCUSS THE ROLE THE FOLLOWING CAN PLAY IN THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE TOTAL CHILD. Prov. 22:6
A. PRAYER
Christian parents must cultivate the habit of praying for their children on a daily basis. This is necessary because the enemy is still busy sowing tares among wheat. We should always pray for divine protection and against the evil influences in the society. We should pray for their salvation and Christian living, as well as the grace to bring them up in the fear and nurture of the LORD.
B. BIBLE STUDY Psalm 78 sets forth a pattern for parenting- a method we can use to ensure that our children know the things of God and what it takes to be a child of God. According to the Psalmist, we can do this by telling the generation to come the praise of the Lord (Vs. 4). When we make them known (vs 5) to our children, they will see by our words and testimonies that we are Christians. Speaking of God’s guidelines for living, Moses said “You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up” (Deut. 6:7).
C. PARENTAL EXAMPLE
By personal example we can show and tell our children what it means to be a Christian. Children may close their eyes to advice but they keep their eyes open to examples. A man was having a little chat with his young son. He was trying to tell him what a Christian should be like and how he should act. When he had finished talking, his son looked at him and asked a stunning question. Daddy, the by wondered, “have I ever seen a Christian?”. What a telling commentary on the life of that father. How would we feel if our children were to respond to us in the same way?
D. FELLOWSHIP
Hebrews 10:25 reads “Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching”. Some parents always leave their children at home when going to fellowship on the excuse that their children are too young to participate in such meetings and may be disturbing them when fellowship is going on. The result is that such children become strange fellows to Christian environments. By the time these parents feel that they are big enough to attend fellowship, the interest will not be there.
Parents should therefore always take their children along to fellowship meetings where they will learn more about God and godliness.
E. CHRISTIAN CAMP MEETINGS
Christian Camp Meetings is the gathering of believers in a particular place usually in an isolated place for some days for the purpose of learning more about God and Christian living. Activities such as Bible Study, talk, exposition, prayers, counselling etc. feature in such meetings. Camp meetings provide a better opportunity to minister to children. There is ample time to minister to each child adequately; there is sustained Christian interaction, and a better evangelistic and disciplinary atmosphere. Christian camp meetings therefore, provide an opportunity to teach and express in practical terms Christian living. A child who participates in such activities will no doubt yield more of his life to Christ.
F. DISCIPLINE
Discipline can take the form of verbal expression of rejection of a child’s action or inaction. The emphasis in such expression should be on what was wrong and the necessary action to remedy the situation. It could also take the form of asking the child to do some household chores kneeling down, canning the child (Prov. 23:13, 14) denying the child certain privileges such as not providing for his birthday etc. The reason for which the child is being disciplined should be explained to him. And the essence of every disciplinary measure must be to effect positive change in the child. However, parents should avoid beating their children when they are angry as this may lead to infliction of injury that may be regretted later and they should not deny the child food and accommodations.
Q6. WHAT ARE THE RESULTS OF NEGLECTING PARENTAL RESPONSIBILITIES?
In many homes, the children never really get to know their parents because they don’t take the time to be with them. In the morning, they are either too hurried or too groggy. After work, they are so tired that they spend their evening snoozing in front of the television. On Saturdays, they are doing household chores, golfing with friends, attending meetings or busy elsewhere. On Sundays, they are glued to various forms of activities. The weeks, months, and years pass without parents ever really getting to know their children.
When confronted on this serious omission or neglect, they often refer to their busy schedule, at times even with the work of God. Perhaps that was exactly the predicament of Eli the High Priest. So busy with ministration and counselling that his home front was neglected. He was never excused, rather God punished him for negligence of duty, (1 Samuel 3:11-14). There are some parents who love worldly pleasure and have little time for their children.
They may be showering gifts on their children to compensate for their lack of personal attention. However, we must realize that shallow, outward pretenses of affection are not enough. Though children may express great interest in gifts, they need our love and tender concern above all things. Some other parents don’t provide the physical needs of their children. They give birth to these children, but never bother to feed, clothe and shelter them. They are careless about their education or vocation. Some of these children then resort to stealing, harlotting, and other illegal businesses to meet their needs. Such parents may proffer excuses for neglecting their God given responsibilities. But God, the children themselves and the society do not accept such excuses (1 Tim. 5:8).
The wise parents should provide regular occasions for just talking, laughing and teaching their children the ways of God and about life, in addition to providing their physical needs. We strive to teach our children the truths of God’s word, and we pray that they will accept Jesus as their savior and live for Him. Yet children from the godliest families have been known to reject it all. That was what happened to Hezekiah’s son. Hezekiah had his faults, but he tried to serve God. According to 2 Kings 18:5, he trusted in the Lord more than all the other Kings of Judah. And it seems logical to assume that his son Manasseh, who became king at the age of 12 was aware of his father’s faith. Yet Manasseh turned against God and “did evil in the sight of the Lord” (2 Chron. 33:2). Manasseh got mixed up in idolatry, immorality, and sorcery. He even sacrificed his own sons in pagan rituals. But God was not done with him. After Manasseh had been hauled off to Babylon in chains, he turned to God, who heard his supplication, and brought him back to Jerusalem. Finally, after years of rebellion, he came to his senses and recognized that “the Lord is God”.
It is a longer road to God for some children than for others, but as Manasseh’s example shows us, we should never give up on those who turn against God.
Therefore, parents should be constant in prayer, consistent in example and compassionate in love for their children.
DAILY LIVING APPLICATION
Children are great potentials. The time and attention we give them in Jesus’ name is one of life’s most fruitful investments.
Children do not automatically become model men and women. Their development must be carefully nurtured. Raising children calls for patience, diligence, determination, wise instruction, and loving correction.
The training of a child demands diligence. By providing their daily bread, clothing, and housing them, providing good education or vocation for them, teaching them morals and the word of God, praying and counselling them, we are molding their character and their future and they will choose to be like Christ.
MEMORY VERSE
Proverbs 29:15
“The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame”.
DAILY DEVOTIONAL GUIDE
Monday: Children are gifts from God.
Psalm 127:1-5
Tuesday: Submit to God.
Romans 12:1-3
Wednesday: Study to perfection
2 Tim. 2:12-17
Thursday: Qualities of leaders start from home.
1 Tim. 3:4-7
Friday: The words of a total child.
Prov. 31:1-9
Saturday: The Word for success.
Joshua 1:6-8